The year is 2013, and Earth is lost. Last year, the entire globe was declared "unfit for human life." Anyone who could bought passage for a vessel that would take them into outer space. Those left on Earth were the losers and their masters, the godly success stories. Now, all losers must depend on the success stories for food, water, shelter, and $3.65 an hour. You are part of a band of losers, wanderers questing to find a success story. You must fight those who challenge your mission, explore the dangerous wasteland, and prove your worth to success stories in order to complete your LoserQuest!

The year is 2005, and today you take your revenge. An international trust-conglomerate-corporation just bought up your home and that of pretty much every other loser, and so you wander with only two thoughts: first, "Are we there yet?" and second, "MegaMultiCashEconoCorp's's gonna pay." You must fight off other losers to protect your turf, and try to expand your rabble of losers. Vengeance is your true goal, and to wreak it you must bring that corporation with a really long name to its knees. Once your home has been retaken, and Big Business will never rear its ugly head again, your LoserQuest will be complete!

The year is...well, you can have Jeeves look into that. Being fantastically wealthy and nearing the end of your days, you have two choices. The first is philanthropy, but philanthropists are pansies. The second is to be a part of the latest craze, Loser Taming, and pay the scum at the bottom of society to fight each other for the your amusement and that of the rest of the upper crust. You're a Loser Tamer, and you would have it no other way. You live to have your prized losers fight other Tamers, including the CEO Lords and the truly great Elitist Four. Once you have beaten them, you will be a Loser Tamer Master! I like saying LoserQuest!

Setting

The first setting for LoserQuest is, as the paragraph above will tell you, Earth after almost all success stories went into space (In short, "Abandonment Issues"). Only poor and/or really annoying people were not allowed onto the spacecraft. These people, the losers, must seek out the few remaining success stories to be able to find work. The Earth was abandoned because a) it was mostly a desert due to global warming, b) there was random, rusted mechanical junk everywhere, and c) everything was just so crowded. Junk piles up on anything that stays still for too long--if someone sleeps out in the open, they wake up the next morning with a fine coating of screws, nuts, washers, and bolts. The success stories live in massive towers of obsidian and quartz, filled with strange machines (press any key...what is this...any key?). The losers live in whatever they can find (mobile homes, abandoned cars, cubicles, slums) and often compete over important turf. The success stories command the outlying areas for a small distance, forming small states that are constantly at war. Losers are always used as pawns in such wars, as success stories are too noble to be touched by losers.

The second setting is "Trashed Trailers," where the trailer park that many losers call home gets demolished to make way for a mega-corporation's newest project. Strangely, houses and apartments in other neighborhoods are demolished, almost at random, to make way for cell towers, warehouses, processing plants, and other out-of-place buildings. Most of these houses were home to losers before their demolition. Coincidence? In Trashed Trailers, there is no such thing. Everything is the success stories' fault; it seems like they're trying to wipe losers off the face of the Earth...but that's just some wacko conspiracy theory. But for the losers, life officially blows. Without a home, they have to fight other losers for turf, a constant battle against an ever-increasing number of rabbles of losers. These "rabble grapples" serve as training for the few losers who have more on their mind than survival--they want revenge. They will bring the good fight to MegaMultiCashEconoCorp's door, and somehow get them to return their homes.

The third setting is Loser Tamer! The idea for Loser Tamer was of being forged in pit Japan that is of. Many Rich American Investor-sans were of the having to have many monies, and---------.......... Sorry, the De-Translato-Matic was on. In Loser Tamer, you play as a success story, a fabulously wealthy old man who has chosen to hire and "tame" losers so that they can fight other tamers' losers in ritual combat. In order to begin their quest, they must travel to the massive Tamer Island, an artificial development where no external laws can prevent Loser Battling, and a volcano is about 2 miles away from a patch of tundra, which is about half a mile from a tropical rainforest. Why this crazy geography, you ask? Because a given CEO Lord must have an environment that fits the theme of his Battle Mansion, of course. A number of tamers often join together to form a "tamer friends friendly team" so they can challenge the Loser League. To do so, they must collect the Eight Stock Options of the CEO Lords, then take on the Elitist Four to become Loser Tamer Masters! Then, they'll get all the chicks, despite being 80+ years old! Huzzah!

  Random Loser: